5 Crucial Mothers’ Mistake Why Girls Are Needy in a Relationship

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alt="an image of a mother and the daughter. Illustration of controlling girls being needy in a relationship"
Image source : pexels / Lucas Souza

Being needy in a relationship as a girl, is also caused by poor relationship she had / has with the mother. So, what are those mistakes?

Girls are not emotional beings for nothing, your relationship with them as a mother goes a long way on how they manage their emotions.

Whether the emotions has got to do with their early or later ages, emotion is emotion to them, and what they grow with is what they carry.

Clingy and emotionally needy daughters or those you perceive to be one, are simply damzels in distress in their own emotions.

This will not just hot their feelings, it has a tendency to obstruct their self-esteem

You hardly can tell when you’re clingy or needy in a relationship actually, unless you’re been told by Someone, probably a person you love.

However, if you managed to figure it out yourself, applauds for you, it shows that you’re in charge of your emotions.

Just in case though, you can know if you’re clingy when you don’t seem to be satisfied emotionally, no matter how hard the person in question tries.

Effects to others

In the right justification, it’s not okay to be clingy when considering the person at the receiving end of the behavior.

So, incase you know for sure that you’re doing it to the person in question intentionally, you may want to drop it.

If you do it unintentionally, that is considerable, knowing that is not your fault.

So, check well to know where you fall on this. Am guessing you are already kind of curious to know how those receiving it feels.

Not good at all, trust me. They are not liking the situation, and they hope it ends pretty quick.

My take on Mother-Daughter towards being needy in a relationship

Right from the moment a baby comes out from the womb, she doesn’t expect anything other than care, love, respect and honesty.

I personally can’t deny the fact that females are really emotional beings and you should know that as well.

The best you can do is to make efforts to ensure you don’t tamper with the emotions is to abstain from things that will hurt their emotions.

Well, what you actually don’t know or rather haven’t been told is that –

the relationship with their mother is a foundation to their emotions inside and on the outside.

That’s the more reason why you should love them as much as possible, and it starts with the mother.

It doesn’t just start and ends at tender ages, it should be a continual process.

No need to quit along the line with the mindset that you have come a long way already, nope, not so soon.

When they begin to reach maturity age, you can then take a deep breath and relax a little.

clingy and needy in relationship

So, after the damage that provoked that behavior has been done, I guess you now know where it torments the most..

Yes, in relationships actually. They tend to be needy in a relationship. but what is the way forward?

What now can be identified in relationships about it, before the solution from knowing what caused it?

In relationship though, you can tell if a girl is clingy by she never being satisfied of the emotional care she gets.

It just isn’t enough at all, no matter your efforts.

With that, we can say that a clingy behavior is acting in a manner that clearly frustrates the efforts of a person innocent of his or her emotional care.

Unlike the case of girls, a clingy boyfriend is more often as a result of habit he developed or he probably doesn’t grow up.

In order not to ignite flames, the right way to tell him will go a long way, especially when dealing with a toxic relationship.

You can do that by letting it out in an indirect way when he’s in a good mood or when you both are having a good time together.

Being too needy in a relationship alternatively, is just the right mixture of what clingy means and how it affects the relationship.

One can actually be too nice in relationships, but it shouldn’t be a problem with the right person.

How to stop being clingy and jealous

The best way to stop being clingy or needy in a relationship is to develop a great relationship with your mother.

Although, this rather would have been taken care of at an early stage, but it’s never too late to get things straight.

Though later in this article, we shall be looking at those down sides on the mother’s side that causes girls to be that way.

I know there’s absolutely nothing wrong for you to attach yourself to someone.

but there’s a difference between that and being clingy or needy of emotions.

The neediness here is the fact that, the person possessing it can’t stay without feeling loved.

Sometimes, not satisfied with the amount of love you give to them.

Children, especially the daughters, should be shown love by the parents especially from the mother.

It’s a sort of mother and daughter relationship.

Even though daughters tend to be closer to their fathers most times, the mothers should never limit their relationship with their daughters.

When they lack that amount of respected relationship from their mother, it results to clingy trait and emotional neediness.

So, to answer the BIG question, why do girls end up being clingy or needy in a relationship?

Why girls are needy in a relationship

You now have a clear understanding of where I am driving at. Hopefully, from the causes below, you should be able to fix one or two things.

Better still, you should be able to find answers to your long awaited questions.

We shall now look at the causes of clingy and emotionally needy daughters:

1. Being dismissive

Now, if you get more observant, you will notice that daughters will mostly go their mothers for advice.

Sometimes, for support or in any other way the mother could assist with her problems.

Dismissing your daughters at crucial times like this will only make them feel rejected, and to the extent of being needy in a relationship.

It will also make them lack experience at certain things in life.

If such happens, the more curious ones will be forced to portray trait of emotional neediness, even at an early age.

At that point in time, that’s when they just feel they could get that which you deprived them of from anyone.

Yeah, they jump at anyone and when I mean anyone, I mean anyone that crosses their path.


Apart from the fact of jumping into anyone, it doesn’t just end there really.

Because they are emotionally hurt as a result of poor relationship with their mother, they’re combating something more serious.

Now, when you think you’re trying to show them emotional care, it just won’t be enough.

The main factor is missing. that’s what it’s needed to feel the gap of all the emotional neediness.

Instead of being dismissive to your daughter and making them turn away from you, use that as a medium to create stronger bond between you and your daughter.

Learn how to be welcoming to your daughters, it will set the right pace for your relationship.

It’s also your duty to pay more attention to know when they need your assistance, even when they don’t ask.

2. Being controlling

Don’t put a policy of restrictions on your daughter, rather apply the rule of diplomacy when the situation calls for such.

In most cases, you will realize that daughters get scared of a controlling person.

I will advice you to relent from this act, unless you know that’s what you want, but it doesn’t do any good.

The mistake most mothers make is creating a feeling of fear on their daughters about them.

Whether it’s done consciously or unconsciously, it’s very important not to get them to be scared of you.

Well, you could try such act at their tender ages, that could be okay to some extent.

However, when that child begins to mature, it’s vital you respect that about them.

Try as much as possible to limit the controlling act or better still, you should stop it.

There’s a safer way to go about it if you want to set good upbringing, but not in a controlling manner.

As long as you make it clear to them that it’s nothing more than trying to put them on track.

In that case, don’t risk controlling them in regards to making efforts to putting them on track, they’re are not a fan of it.

3. Being unavailable

Nothing hurts a daughter emotionally like unavailable parents, especially from the mother.

Most times, the daughters will need that care and love from you as a mother.

The best they expected of you at that time is for you to be there as their mother.

Unfortunately, you cannot tell when your daughter crave for that love and care they deserve

that’s why being available for them is important as it seems.

How do you do this? It’s simple. Prioritize their attention over ungencies.

The better you can convey this to them, the better you relief them from the emotional stress.

If you travel a lot, it’s vital you communicate often with your daughters.

If it’s possible they can travel along with you, let them do so.

There’s a certain feel of connection daughters get with their mother when they can do fun things together.

The later rewards will eventually pay off when the daughter begins to stay away from home.

Those memories of course, daughters will barely forget it, especially when it involves the mother.

Such memories as simple as even travel experience she had with the mother will keep her going when she feels down.

There are many little things you do with them that you feel doesn’t hold ground, but trust me, most times, such things means a lot to them.

4. Being emerged

That lost but found sort of mother is emotionally damaging to daughters. why not plan your schedule to suite them

You don’t want to get them feeling that you could be there for them, but you chose not to and all of a sudden, you just appear

Especially when they begin to feel very close to you for the attention you presented.

Sadly, the mistake you make is that you just disappear, and when next you come back could be when they have forgotten about you or about to.

If you choose be there for them at all times, I advice it remains so for them and seal it as a deal.

The strong reason to this is so that they don’t get to feel something different from your expectations.

Such as the thought that you’re toying around with their emotions.

Later on, they crave for a better one or excess of it somewhere else.

The momery of kids develops at a rapid pace with what happens around them

Their brains should also be properly stimulated before they reach maturity age.

If you can’t stimulate it well enough at their tender ages, it will transfer to a not-so-good behavior in their later ages.

5. Being combative

If you’re the mean type of mother, it’s best to you keep such trait far away from your daughters.

Girls are very emotional beings and according sudies, they are 70% more likely to miss-quote your mean personality.

If it ever gets to them and they wait to see if there will be a tweak to it and nothing happens, questions may begin to come out.

Some of the instances where they could feel so are feeling the lack of care and love, hatred or something discouraging to their emotions.

When such lingers for a long time, be ready to face the consequences of what you caused.

Just like I mentioned about their brains and memory development, they can be very good with memories, don’t dare them on this.

You should also note that their tender ages is very important concerning how you treat them.

As a result of this, you should consider it when dealing with them.

Failure to do that, am afraid things could go side ways in the long run.

They may grow to maturity age and understand you for such trait, but not at their tender ages.

To wrap things up, don’t take the relationship between you and your daughter for granted to avoid making them clingy.

There’s more to life than having a bad relationship with your daughters.

Wrap up

It’s important to understand and accept how emotional girls can be, this will really go a long way on how their emotions will be managed.

To make sure that the girl will maintain a healthy emotional state free from emotional neediness, it requires a solid relationship with the mother.

Most relationship with on-going emotional neediness from the girl was as a result of this poor Mother-daughter relationship.

However, developing a great relationship between the mother and the daughter should be able to resolve this.

While developing the relationship as a mother, it’s also important to take note of those actions that could trigger the neediness and avoid them.

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Author: Ejiblog

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